Tuesday, June 09, 2009

I want...

I want....
a clean and ordered house.
a devoted and fully equipped school room.
a devoted and fully equipped studio for me to write and sew.
enough time and energy to enjoy all of the above.

I want....
perfectly behaved children.
friendly and faithful children.
literate and learning children.
enough wisdom and discretion to know how to mother them well.

I want....
a perfectly landscaped and productive garden.
room and fences to have a dog.
some ducks in my orchard.
enough energy, knowledge and time to keep all the above well.

Today I have....
a muddled and messy house.
some boxes and shelves stuffed with projects
a computer set up in a corner and a sewing machine behind my chair.
precious little time and less energy.

Today I have....
wonderful, ordinary kids
with all the inherent joys and challenges
knowledge of what I am NOT getting done with them
knees, where I constantly ask for knowledge and wisdom

Today I have....
a work in progress that is rather muddy at the moment!
no fences, no dog
no ducks, no orchard
not enough energy and time to keep them if I had them.

Right now, I am going to work with what I DO have.

And one day, perhaps, what I have and what I want will meet in the middle.

Or better yet,

perhaps one of these days what I want won't matter so much

and what HE wants will become everything.


May I be faithful with this that you have given me.
May I work with what I have rather than chasing fantasies.
May I be faithful with this quiet life you have gifted to me.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi Jess,
I tend to prioritise things into needs rather than wants, and then if it falls into the category of a need, we buy it.

Our home is exactly that - a home. We don't have the newest kitchen, but it is functional and it works. My bed is still the same one that we had when we got married, but it's comfortable. I don't have the latest in jewellery, or the newest car, but we do look after what we have. After all, we are supposed to be good stewards of what we do have.

I'm grateful that God constantly provides for us, and that we have "normal" children (if there is any such thing?). I'm grateful that I have a husband who loves and cares for us, and works hard to make our house a home.

Have a wonderful week.