I have all these expectations of myself.
I want to be the super Mum, the brilliant cook, the sexy wife, the inspiring educator, the awesome writer, the fantastic gardener. I don't want to be an adequate mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend, homemaker, writer etc. I want to be INCREDIBLE, AMAZING, AWE INSPIRING.
Surely this is not too much to ask?
So I start the day with my high expectations. TODAY I will get the house spotless, I will impart great wisdom and knowledge, I will cook yummy meals, I will discipline and get my kids to behave, I WILL.
Except I don't.
I don't meet these high expectations of myself.
There are those who will say that I am expecting too much. That it is more than one woman can ever do. That I need to reduce my expectations, relax, have a little "me" time and make my husband take up some of the slack.
There is something about that advice that sits wrong with me, like a curry reheated one too many times.
Surely I can be brilliant, fantastic, awesome, AMAZING?!
I feel like I kinda am deep down inside. After all, deep down inside I am a princess, daughter of a Royal Heritage that goes back to Eden and Beyond. I am the recipient of The Gift. If I lack the potential to be something awe inspiring, if I do not have the potential to have the Glory of God Himself flow through my fingertips, why on earth was the sacrifice made for me? God loves me and He wants to make me something Amazing. No, not make something Amazing FOR me. He wants to make ME something AMAZING.
So kicking back, passing the buck and settling for mediocre?
It doesn't sit right.
So I am trading up.
I am swapping my High Expectations for GREAT Expectations.
I expect that today I will:
Worship. With my family and on my own. From my heart here in my home I will sing Glory, Glory, Glory to the Lord God Almighty Who Is and Was and Is To Come. And my voice will meld with that of the Angels in the Throne Room.
Love. With my whole heart, with no safety net, free fall style I will love those who God has put in my way to love. This is my Heritage because I am a daughter of one Who Is Love.
Serve. I will wrap the towel around my waist as Christ did at the Last Supper. I will make a home for my husband that is as comfortable and relaxing as I can possibly make it today. I will feed my children the best food I can put together to help their bodies grow strong and I will discipline them to make their hearts grow strong. I will do the dirty work of home maker with the heart of a servant, with a view to becoming more like THE Servant.
Rejoice. I will rejoice in the Lord Always and again, I will REJOICE. I will find joy in each day and will Bless the Lord because of it. I will laugh. I will sing. I will smile. I will rejoice.
And somehow, all this looks so much more achievable.