Thursday, September 04, 2008

Update - at last!

It has been forever since I had a chance to get on here and blog and I have been missing it. I dream of the day that my computer is set up in my beautiful light blue sunny study, book shelves surrounding me as I write and write and write. A spot to sew! The front window letting in the afternoon sun and providing a view out onto my lovely front garden. At the moment the study is still partially lined with the old horse hair plaster that is a horrible dirty yellow, the floor is unsealed (the hardwood will polish beautifully! at the moment, it is just filthy) and the front window looks out on a wild mix of weeds, an overgrown rose bush and overcrowded bulbs refusing to flower! A large part of living in a renovator's delight is living on dreams.

is sporting a few grazes from her first major bike stack. She landed face first off the foot path on the road (no cars in sight and it was in a parking area really) and, after a few kisses, jumped back on the bike and continued riding. I didn't even notice the graze on her cheek and developing bruises! I was very proud of her for keeping at it. She constantly surprises me. Where I spent the majority of my childhood with my head in a book showing little (if any!) interest in my peers - or people for that matter, she attracts children like a flower attracts butterflies and has much of our little village on first name basis with her doll. Where I would either not try or blunder through life's challenges, she is so cautious (to the point of being fearful sometimes) and is an absolute perfectionist. She craves success and accolade, where the praise or otherwise of others has never had a major effect on my life choices. She is not a reflection of me or an extention of my person. She is a unique person, with a uniques roll in the world, given to me to nurture for a time. What a blessing, what a gift, what a responsibility!

has all of a sudden grown up overnight. My favourite thing is when he tells me he loves me or warns me of incomming kisses! I can't put my finger on any one thing that makes him so much more grown up lately. Increased conversation, his quiet determination to learn to read and do everything else Erin does (including ride her bike), his attempts to join in games with other children (he doesn't quite have the social finesse of his older sister, but he does OK) and his fierce insistance on doing jobs for Mummy (setting the table, making breakfast, stacking wood!) all add up to make him seem so grown up. He still needs a fair bit of translation when talking on the phone to Nanny or Nana Julie, but his speech is getting even more clear by the day. He plays beautifully with Erin and Christopher now. He actually plays better with Christopher than Erin does at the moment because he allows Christopher some limited choice and freedom! The enthusiasm he showed at seeing the 'new baby' on the tv (ultrasound at the hospital) was adorable. He still has patches of dry skin on his cheeks which I am treating with QV lotion.

is walking around furniture and even letting go while standing up for a minute or so! I am not ready for that yet. I know he is getting older, but I just figured he took so long to crawl he'd put off things like that for a while. There are definate attempts at words among his conversations (most of which is very articulate for not containing any actual words) but nothing I would actually call a first word really. He tries to push the boundaries and try out ruling the roost a bit which seems to be typical of our kids at this age. It seems early compared to a lot of other children and I don't know if this is because they are very strong personalities or because we don't over baby our babies so tend to notice it sooner. Either way, he would definately rule the roost if we let him. He has not interest whatsoever in the idea of being a big brother. So long as it doesn't effect his cuddles and boobie access he's happy!

The New Baby:
will not be arriving until mid-January most likely. I was a little uncertain of my dates and my cycles were a little irregular so the Ultrasound and my midwife's estimate places us about the tenth of January. This is a little disappointing for me as I had plans to go to our Church camp on the 16th and bubby, in all likelyhood, will still be firmly in place at that stage! We will just have to play things by ear. My iron stores were very low but this is probably because of all the nose bleeds and I am now taking a liquid herbal iron suppliment which makes a bit of difference to my energy levels. I am loving feeling the little pokes and prods, even when bub kicks straight up and causes my breathing to give a little hiccup! I'm no longer bending quite as easily and there is a definate difference in my posture, but I have got a few lovely belly rubs from Beloved!

The house:
has benefitted from routines, but amid the boxes that I can't unpack until we have the study ready, it is difficult to keep things anywhere near clean let alone tidy. We hand in the keys to the old house in a fortnight and I will be VERY happy to have that off our backs. We need to just focus on here. I find it tiring and depressing to be constantly tidying and cleaning but still have the house looking like a bomb site with little possibility of relief until Jon can finish some of the projects. As I said, renovation is living on dreams! One area where I am still experiencing success is the laundry. This was a major area of struggle for me so I consider it a major triumph to have been on top of the washing for almost a MONTH! As we speak, all my ironing is done! This is major for me. I don't mind ironing, it is just a matter of finding time when little ones aren't underfoot. There is still no shower and, although I am hanging out to have one again, I have developed a renewed love of bubble baths. I often read a chapter in there which works better than trying to read in bed where I tend to fall asleep a few sentences in. Our routine has made a space for me to spend some time in Bible study every day which has done wonders for my sanity. The lack of computer access has had me pining a little for writing (my best writing is done at the keyboard!) and I have scraps of paper and exercise books falling apart with snatches of ideas. The dilema of any writer: to have a life uses up so much writing time, to be without a life leaves one with nothing to write about! Everything to it's season. One day I will write that novel, complete those articles, and compile that book of poetry. One day I will edit out all those exclaimation marks that I so overuse in the blog and refine, edit, refine, edit and actually have something I'd be happy to see in REAL print (this doesn't count, it's just a glorified journal for me! I forget there are real people out there who read it).

I am finding it difficult, I confess. I am still walking most days but I am lucky to make it to the exercise bike once a week. Why is it slipping? Partially self discipline - I keep finding other things to do instead, and partially the difficulty of trying to organise this chaos. There are never enough hours in the day and exercising, I'm afraid, simply gets rationalised away. I need to do it too as I am eating everything not nailed down. If I try and cut down on my food intake I start to resemble a sloth - it seems where some people's metabolism first digs into the stores on their hips, mine actually thinks my brain is where it should dig in to boost it's nutritional needs. I'd like to say I am trying to just stick with the healthy food etc. but true confessions? Jon and I polished off choc chip and stem ginger biscuits last night, after I had eaten several biscuilts during the day (I got them to take to playgroup, I'm Mum of the Month and it's my job ro organise crafts etc. so I had to sample!) and because I made a special tea for Jon and I after the kids were in bed, I somehow managed to snack constantly between feeding the kids their tea and eating ours. There is also an empty bucket of icecream that Jon got very little of (I rationalised that by saying I needed the freezer space) and I should really know better after how HUGE I got when I was having Christopher!!


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