I think, sometimes, on here I give the impression that everything goes perfectly 99.9% of the time, the house runs smoothly with only a few little bumps in the road and my children are mostly well behaved, self aware, bright little buttons who always use their intelligence for good and not evil.
This is not the case:
This morning I got up (late after staying up VERY late the night before) and everything started smoothly.
First bump: I find I forgot to put a nappy on Erin at bedtime last night. Messy!
Second bump: the lamb that I got out of the freezer was still 98% frozen, no delux lamb roast meal tonight! Oh well, I will think of something else.
Third bump: Paid a bill online and got destracted shopping on e-bay - oops!! - but it doesn't matter, we can get back on track I'm sure. Have breakfast and songs and prayers.
Fourth bump: Christopher is LOUDLY protesting morning nap time after only 25 minutes rather than the usual 2 hours. OK, he can go in the hug-a-bub while we hang out the washing and pick some blackberries for tea.
Fifth bump: as we go outside a visitor arrives. I put aside the washing - that can happen any time! - and spend a couple of hour picking laurel berries and plums with a lovely lady who will make me some laurel jam in return! We are totally out of whack now but I decide to prioritise, and if I am careful with my use of time I can probably make some fresh pasta to make dinner special! So I rush around getting kids fed lunch and settled.
Starting to loose count of the bumps now, and they are coming in clusters!
Christopher is unsettled and it takes me some time to sort him out.
Billy chooses NOT to eat his lunch and goes to bed (wearing a disposible because I didn't get the nappy covers hung out and dried this morning).
Erin wants to do school work and I sit her down with the book she made the other day to finish illustrating it then go and check on Billy to see (and smell) the reason for his noise. He has removed his nappy and, well, you can imagine! I mutter a short prayer of thanks that the fastidious nature of Billy prevented any finger painting or (ugh!) tasting. I wasn't as lucky two years ago with his sister! I plonk him in the bath and clean up the mess.
Erin gets herself a book from her room and wakes Christopher in the process. He is only mildly protesting while I sort Billy out with some clothes.
I go and sort out Christopher and notice a strange thumping noise. Billy is in the study (yes, I left the baby gate open!) and is thumping a small heater with a large metal object (thankfully the heater was NOT plugged in!
The resulting nose from my 'redirection' (translation: muttering 'get out into the lounge room NOW!' through clenched teeth) sends Christopher into louder wails of anguish and tiredness.
Crying also makes Billy cough and vomit partially digested plum everywhere (he has an ultra sensitive gag reflex) including over a very nice blue teddy bear. I clean up Billy, the floor and the bear (with Erin running a blow by blow commentary on the action) and put the kids on my bed to watch playschool while I resettle Christopher.
I find that Christopher is in as much distress about the fact that he has exploded poo up the back of the nappy and over himself. I clean Christopher up and sit in here to write this as he feeds.
I think fresh pasta is off the menu.
I have managed to bake some Challah bread in with all of that, but I have defrosted 1 kg of mince that I now need to do something about. I also need to get Red bear hung out on the line without Billy seeing and back in again before the next bed time. I need to remake all the kids beds. I need to put away the clean, folded washing on the floor. I need to tidy the kitchen. I now have to go and do some of these things NOW!
And it's only 3:30pm! Surely nothing else can go wrong........
It is 5:30 now and we are still in the thick of things, but I wanted to stop and tell you about this. I was changing the sheets just now (MY sheets. Erin was so interested in playschool she didn't make the toilet :S) while my older two played in a 'cave' made out of a quilt, and arm chair and an ironing board. All of a sudden I was captured by the soft fold in the side of the neck of Christopher. I just had to nibble it! Amidst the baby giggles and that soft sweet smell they have, Billy joined us. We had a hilarious game of hide the boys for about three minutes with the top sheet, resulting in Erin joining us and a repeat performance with the doona. Tea is not done. The kitchen is a mess. Erin's bed needs making. The lounge room looks like a bomb has hit. But I just had to stop and tell you.
My worst day with them, is better than my best day without them.
I have to go now. Christopher threw up on the bed when we were playing and I need to check that it washed off properly now it is dry and I'm not sure what the older two are doing..........